Stretch Marks

Charlotte:  Mommy, why do you have wrinkles on your stomach?

Me:  They are called stretch marks and sometimes women get them when they get pregnant.

Charlotte:  Why?

Me:  Because the skin stretches so much.

Charlotte:  That’s kind of weird.

Me:  I agree.

Plans for 2015

In August when I decided to change course and slow down, I decided to spend time just being.  That of course for me meant learning something new—meditation.  I picked up a book called, Awakening Somatic Intelligence.  The description sounded reasonable – the idea that there are three types of intelligence: Cognitive, Emotional, and Somatic.  I am often described has having cognitive intelligence and continue challenge myself to become more intelligent most frequently through reading.  Emotional intelligence comes naturally to me because I am highly empathetic, almost to the point of empathic.  Somatic intelligence is an awareness of your body and how it moves/works.

This seemed like a great idea and could work well with ballet.  So I started the book.  Then I got to the part where someone claimed they were able to re-grow an ovary because of somatic meditation.  Um, nope.  That is bullshit.  I stopped reading the book altogether.  I can believe there is a mind over matter, and I know from experience in ballet that a strong awareness of parts of your body is important to health, but I don’t believe for a single solitary moment that you can re-grow body parts because you meditate over it.  Sooo…perhaps meditation, or at least that specific book, is not my cup of tea. 

Beyond that book being terrible, I also had a really busy life between August and the end of the year.  I am tired of being tired.  Not having enough time for anything really.  Trying to fit something else into my schedule.  I spend a lot of time thinking there isn’t enough time to do all the things in life I want to do.  I have to remember that life isn’t about always doing things, but also about enjoying things.

All this to say, that my plan for 2015, at least for the first 6 months, is to continue just being present.  I have had good friends ask me if I ever just do nothing.  My answer is always no.  Sometimes I want to do something, but most times I have no idea how to do nothing.  I’ve had other friends tell me I’m really productive or question how I accomplish so much.  Both of those are good traits, but I also need to learn to balance and enjoy what I have already accomplished, rather than looking to get more things done.  I rarely just sit down.  I don’t watch TV anymore, and our theater room gets very little use.  Even when I try to watch a movie, I am distracted, anxious or sleepy.  I can sit and read a book for hours and days on end, but I constantly feel like I should be doing something instead of sitting down.

It’s good to always challenge myself to become a better person or to learn something new.  It is also good to be present today and be more balanced – less stressed, less anxious, less tired.  I want to friends to be able to ask me to go out with them and for me to be able to say yes.  I want to sit down once a week and watch a movie without feeling anxious or too tired to watch it.  I want to write more in a private way, for myself. In order to do any of those things, I have to stop doing new things for a little while.  On my list for 2015 still includes things to learn.  Of course it does!

1. Be present and enjoy the quiet.  This will require me getting back to riding the train more often than I drive.  Quieting my critical mind in ballet class.  Saying yes to plans with friends more often.  Playing with my children.  Watching movies with my husband.
2. Start pointe work in the fall for ballet.  This will require me to strengthen my ankles, feet, and core.  I will only take my pre-pointe class with pointe shoes and not actually dance on pointe until the following spring (if I’m ready).
3. Complete a 2 week ballet intensive (dancing 2-3 hours every day for two weeks) in the summer and take at least 1 class with a different teacher.
4. Read a book on music theory and pull out some of my music and the keyboard as a way to start self teaching for piano.  I mostly want to do this so I can hear and enjoy the music in ballet, which will help with finding the quiet.
5. Start writing in my 642 Things to Write About book.

Chris wants to get his blue belt by December 2015, complete the Rugged Maniac, and learn more about music theory.  He hasn’t yet decided if that means piano lessons, a music theory class, or self teaching.  Chris also wants to choose an organization that speaks to him and begin volunteering his time.

Charlotte wants to try baseball and Cooper wants to try basketball.

Accomplishments in 2014

Every year in lieu of a New Year’s Resolution, we each decide to learn or try something new.  I am a highly productive person, but I also think I try to add to many things to my list.  Look at what I wanted to do in 2014! Looking back on 2014, I think there are things I ended up learning that I had not intended to learn.

1. Piano:  This is something we all definitely still want to learn, but to be honest we need to find time to fit the lessons in and we aren’t willing to give up other things to make it happen.  At least not yet.  In August, we changed course and chose to not add piano lessons to our already-full-plate.
2. Dance a solo part for ballet:  I danced a solo part for Swan Lake in June.  For the Nutcracker recital in December, I did several dances, as well as the splits.

 

1. Complete Warrior Dash & Tough Mudder:  We did both, and also did the Rugged Maniac.
2. Photography – Instagram once a day:  This didn’t happen.  I like Instagram, but I don’t like pulling out my phone all the time to capture moments.  Not to mention Instagram kills my phone battery because it gets my camera looping and pulling power from the battery via the operating system.  A downfall of switching to Android this year.  I did a few photo shoots this year, got a new Nikon Df (full frame!), and caught up on old photos/vacations so I definitely still worked on photography.
3. Escape/Relax – Read 25 books:  I don’t have any clue how many books I read, but I know for sure it was more than 25.  It was very likely double or triple that, because I read a series that had 24 books, another series with 13 books, and just last week, finished 5 books.  I would keep a count, but it takes away the fun of reading when I’m tracking how much I do it.  Suffice it to say, I have recently added a line item into our budget for books – separate from all other ‘entertainment’ money.  The books that were most impactful for me and still think about, include: The Immortal Life of Henrietta Lacks, Compelling People: The Hidden Qualities that Make Us Influential, The Girls Who Went Away, Ashfall Trilogy, The Glass Castle, and Half Broke Horses.  Suprisingly, only one of those is fiction.
4. Write more – Blogging & Journaling:  Although I did blogging every day in November, and generally kept this blog up (46 blog posts this year, although about 30 of those were in November), as well as my photography blog and ballet/fitness blog, I don’t necessarily feel like I am writing for me all the time.  Something I would like to do more of.
5. Give back – volunteer 1x/month:  I did zero volunteering this year and that is tough for me because I am very service oriented.  I really, really miss volunteering.
6. I learned about make-up (aka my flickr became a selfie feed)!
7. Karate – Chris wanted his purple belt by year end and wanted to do the Spartan race in May:  Due to neck surgery he was delayed in his progress and will be working toward those next year.
8. What’s Next – for Chris:  My husband is much more of an introvert than I am and he will spend hours upon hours thinking things over in his head (while I yap at him to work out my own problems) before he talks to me.  We’ve had a variety of conversations and the most likely area he will work toward is helping to run our foundation that we plan to start in the next 5 years.  We would like our foundation to be a way to give back to our community.  We hope to fund a theater production, provide scholarships to college to students every year, ensure music/PE/art/technology are provided to schools that don’t have strong PTO support or large budgets, support veterans programs, and have programs that support the elderly.  Essentially we want to do our little part to bring some equality to the world to make sure others are afforded the same opportunities to succeed that we now have due to our age, race, and economic level.  This foundation lines up with our values (that we defined in 2013 as part of our personal finance goals):  Fun/Spontaneity, New Experiences/Learning, Security, Health, and Charity/Altruism.
9. Kids:  Cooper wanted to stick with karate and start soccer, both of which he did.  He now has a blue belt with white stripe and is ready to test for blue belt with black stripe.  Although he loves the social aspect of soccer, he doesn’t seem to show the interest or the skill for the sport and mostly goofs off.  Charlotte wanted to do gymnastics and soccer, but midway through the year decided she would prefer karate. She now has a purple belt with black stripe and is ready to test for a blue belt with white stripe.  Charlotte excelled at soccer and was fantastic at being sweeper (effective goalie at this age).
10. Vacation to Hawaii or Alaska – We decided to travel back to North Carolina to visit family instead.  Neither of us were up for planning anything big and it had been awhile since we had seen Chris’ parents and siblings, so we rented a beach front house. 

I never posted more photos about our vacation, but really, the highlight were the crabs.   We also did two adult vacations – one to go camping in Ouray with good friends,

and one for a wedding in Cozumel:

In other good news this year, the kids graduated kindergarten,

Chris finished the laundry room!

And he got a new car!

This year has been full.  We experienced loss this year with my mom and Chris’ uncle, both unexpected.  These losses have affected us more because they deeply affected people we love.  Life continued on and we went swimming, to concerts, and theater shows, and sporting events.  We made new friends – people who we find to be intelligent, funny, and kind.  People who will push us to become better versions of ourselves.  We continue to cherish our forever friendships, but it has been wonderful adding new people to our life. 

We look forward to 2015!

Pinky Promise

Chris put the kids to bed the other night and Charlotte was very upset and crying:

Chris:  Charlotte, why are you crying?

Charlotte:  My brother hurt my feelings. [sobbing]

Chris:  What happened?  How did he hurt your feelings?

Charlotte:  He called me a ‘Pinky Promise Breaker’

Chris:  [stifled laughter]  Well, did you break a pinky promise?

Charlotte:  Yes. [sobs]

Chris:  He didn’t use very nice words, but he is telling the truth.  What was the promise about?

Charlotte:  I promised I would sleep in his room with him, and then I changed my mind.

Chris:  Well maybe next time you shouldn’t make a pinky promise for that.

Charlotte:  Okay. [sobs]

Then he went in to talk to Cooper: I know your feelings were hurt when Charlotte promised to sleep in your room and then didn’t.  Remember that even when we tell the truth, we need to remember to be kind with our words so we don’t hurt other people’s feelings.

I’m happy to know that our kids genuinely love each other.  And I love that they make pinky promises to each other.

New Tattoo

Finally it has healed enough to show off the detail.  The original artist, Joanna at A Bit of Whimsy Art, did an amazing job with the pencil drawing.  The tattoo artist (Jen at Mantra Tattoo) did a phenomenal job translating it to skin.  I have a few touch ups to finish up, but I LOVE it.

Inspired by a Tree Grows in Brooklyn and I may eventually add the quote, “And always, there was the magic of learning things.”

Original artwork:

And ribs:

Mid Back/Upper Shoulder: